Truly and accurately represent who you are 0
Vancouver’s top catches are out there, they’re just working like crazy, taking care of business for a better future that hopefully includes domestic bliss.
Name: Sima Kumar
Occupation: Celebrity stylist
What do you look for in a partner?
Availability, with the subtext of that being someone who is physically available, emotionally available and in a headspace that is available. Integrity. Kindness.
Being a celebrity stylist, is a man’s fashion sense important to you?
It’s not a deal breaker, but it’s important because how someone physically presents himself reflects a deep internal expression and message.
What are your thoughts on falling in love?
We have confusion about what falling in love is. We get so caught up with the feeling of falling in love with the other person because the euphoria covers up our own issues. We project our hopes and dreams on to another person, then this person fills up something that is missing inside of us. This is why the feeling of ecstasy can turn into hatred. Once the object of our affection doesn’t give back what we are going for, that same projection turns into anger and hatred. People need to be in a reality about what falling in love is. It’s very different from compatibility and shared life goals. You can transcend into true love when you see the other for who they are.
What’s your advice to women who self-loathe about their age and relationship status?
In the self-punishment, look for why you are suffering. There is a lie in there somewhere. If we can be honest about where we lie to ourselves and get to a place of taking responsibility, the authenticity and honesty ends up attracting what we want. If you are on the side of fear, then you start feeding the negative ‘cat lady’ stereotypes. If you tell the truth and take responsibility for your life and choices – you have the opportunity to begin again.
Any advice on how to cultivate healthy relationships?
Truly and accurately represent who you are, not the image of who you wish you were or aspire to be. Also you have two ears and one mouth: talk less and listen more. People always tell you where they’re at. Also, how something ends depends on how something begins. If you want to start your life happily ever after, think about the beginning. What begins with a lie will end with a lie. What begins with a betrayal ends in a betrayal. You are starting a new karma (action) every time you engage with someone.
What would you tell your 20-year-old self?
Instead of being so bad-boy addicted, give the nice a guy a chance.
What would tell your 30-year-old self?
Punch fear in the face. Walk unafraid. Our ability to be fearless impacts our life and our ability to love.
What would you tell yourself today?
Keep going. Don’t give up. You are as beautiful and lovable as you want to be at any age.