Mommy's Grounded

Gender reveal parties are totally harmless

By Bianca Bujan

(Getty Images)

(Getty Images)

It’s no secret that party guests scoff at baby shower games.

There are very few who actually enjoy tasting 50 shades of brown baby mush and guessing each flavour, or identifying the brand of a chocolate bar that’s been smeared into a diaper to resemble a day-old bowel movement. But we do it to appease the mom-to-be (or in my case three times over - the gracious party host).

The latest trend to hit the conception controversy train is gender reveal parties. It's a sequel to the baby shower where parents-to-be announce the sex of their unborn spawn by cutting into a cake to reveal pink or blue filling, or open a box to release pink or blue balloons- as a way of letting their friends and family know if they’re expecting a boy or a girl.

Are these parties silly and often unnecessarily over the top? For sure. But they certainly aren’t detrimental to the future of the unborn child or intended to disrespect those who don’t identify with the sex that they were assigned at birth - despite what the latest headlines read.

In a recent article shared in Marie Claire etitled, Dear Parents-to-Be: Stop Celebrating Your Baby's Gender, the author goes off on a tangent explaining why gender-reveal parties are harming the very tiny humans who are being celebrated.

The article’s author states, “my discomfort with the gender-reveal party goes beyond my standard objection to fanfare surrounding gestational markers — which is primarily that, because we don't celebrate non-pregnancy-related milestones with the same enthusiasm, we're reinforcing the archaic notion that a woman's value rests squarely in her ability to grow tiny humans. The issue with gender-reveal parties, in particular, is: Aren't they potentially damaging to said tiny humans?”

She goes on to list statistics on the number of children born with Disorder of Sex Development (DSD) - which occurs in one in every 1,500 births and notes the nearly 150,000 American teenagers who identify as transgender.

In her punch-drunk periphrastic statement, she attempts to dismantle the very celebration of conception (an act I might add, that is mandatory for the future of humanity and is currently on the decline), and claims that celebrating a child’s gender is in fact an archaic and exclusive way to devalue women who chose not to procreate.

Those are weighted statements to make about harmless parties intended to celebrate the looming life that’s about to emerge from the loins of an expectant mother, who just wants to celebrate the only thing she knows about her growing fetus.

In a world filled with much bigger issues, can’t we just let people celebrate the news of their baby’s gender without being labeled as sexist transphobes? Gender reveal parties are totally harmless and not worth the hype surrounding the click-bait headlines.


Bianca Bujan is a mom of three, writer, editor, and marketing consultant. Find her on Twitter @bitsofbee and at Comments: