Opinion Column

Reflection helps in moving forward

AMY CHAN, amyfabulous.com

When I reflect back on my relationships, I realize that each person who has come into my life has helped shaped the person I've become today.

Each has served a specific purpose. People come into your life and can be a great catalyst for your personal change and growth. It's as if you attract that person because you needed to learn, grow, re-evaluate . and then the universe sends someone into your life that can help you achieve just what you need at that time.

Your romantic partners reflect your deepest insecurities, desires, fears and hopes. They reflect you. They come in to your life and regardless whether at the time you feel that they are leaving you better or worse, one thing is sure: they provide you with an opportunity to grow. And that opportunity is either yours to take or to ignore.

We have karma. We repeat scenarios, habits and situations. The people that we attract into our lives are a chance for us to change that karma. We can keep repeating the same habits and negative cycles, or we can grow beyond those blockages and become wiser, stronger and closer to our pure potential.

When you go through a break-up, it can be quite difficult to have this holistic perspective.

But there is light at the end of the tunnel, and the choice you have after the experience is completely in your control. You can easily choose to block out your emotions, blame and harbour resentment.

However, know that this route only harms you and taints the next relationship you will have in the future. Or you can embrace your emotions, be honest with yourself and ask what you can do within to become healthier.

I went through a break-up six months ago that was extremely heartbreaking. During that time, I couldn't find a way to see past the darkness, anger and pain. But fast forward to today, I have to say that I'm thankful for the experience. As challenging as it was it made me so much stronger, and made me re-evaluate my life, my goals and my life vision.

I've realised everything is perfect the way it is. I truly believe when one door closes, it's because another was meant to open.

The relationships that don't work aren't failures nor are they a waste of time. They're meant to happen because they are preparing you for the person you are meant to end up with, and the person you are meant to be. Regard these people as blessings, because they are like teachers and the lessons they leave are a gift.

Ultimately, it is you who chooses how to perceive these experiences, and your happiness depends on that choice.