To all the readers currently enjoying a happy, loving union with your life partner: We know you mean well, but … um … for the love of God, stop asking your single friends the same annoying questions!
We’re sick of having to deflect them at dinner parties.
There’s only so many times one can pull the old, “Mmm, this salad is amazing. Yup, still single. What kind of dressing did you use?” You try doing that all in one breath – not easy.
And we’re also running out of ways to spin our dating dry-spell into something positive.
Don’t know what I mean?
Well, have you ever had a friend lie straight to your face with something along the lines of “I’m just really into my career right now. I mean
between work, friends and yoga, I honestly don’t know where I’d even find the time to make a beautiful and soulful connection with someone special. Besides, I’ve kinda taken a shine to spooning with my pillow night after night.”
You’re not buying it, are you? And we don’t like selling it. So if you love us, you will cease and desist.
Here, then are three seemingly innocent, but totally loaded, questions you should never ask a single person in a social setting:
1. So, why you still single?
Ahhh, the grandaddy of ‘em all. Admittedly, there are several ways to take this one. The first is complimentary, which is probably how it was originally intended. It’s just your way of saying, “You have so much too offer. I don’t get why someone hasn’t scooped you up already.” But all we hear is “What’s wrong with you?” And I think I speak for many of the unhitched peeps who’ve been on the receiving end of this one when I say, “I just haven’t met the right person yet.” That’s it. That’s all. No big mystery to solve here people.
2. Do you think you’re being too picky?
Hmm. Depends. If by “picky,” you mean I don’t want to bear children, start a life and grow old with someone I’m not attracted to in the least, then yes, guilty as charged.
3. So, no kids for you, eh?
This is another one that forces us to lie (especially women of a certain vintage). See, chicks are hip to the fact that talking about ticking biological clocks is a big turn-off for most men.
So when you ask a 30-something-year-old woman this question in mixed company, she’ll most likely feed you a line like, “Oh you know, if it happens, it happens. I’m just really into that aforementioned career right now.”
