Having spent the better part of the weekend enjoying air conditioned media toilets, I ventured for the first time into the sea of blue potable toilets that are servicing the majority of festival fans.
And a fan is what these bad boys could use. I wondered over to the beer garden between the two stages and ran into my sister, who, being a good sister, promptly bought me a double beer - that's two beers in one plastic cup. One plastic cup! Anyway, I had to use the facilities, and it's a long walk from the beer gardens back to the media washrooms, especially with a double beer in hand. So, I decided to brave one of the hundreds of portable toilets.
First off, the stench of human deposits was overwhelming. It staggered me. Toilet paper was piled up in layers almost to the rim of the seat, with human feces interspersed throughout for a vanilla-chocolate swirl effect.
From there (I still had at least half a double beer left), I overhear someone asking his friend if he was selling any Viagra, which would be weird - especially given the fact the buyer was, like, 20 years old - except that we're at a festival, and, hey, shit happens.
Tragically Hip up next, which, given some of the things I've seen over the last two hours, is fitting.
