Divorce is difficult enough. Why must Google make it harder?
A search for Mari Smith, for instance, yields over 10 million results. The Canadian woman dubbed “the pied piper of the online world” by Fast Company magazine is a world-recognized expert in Internet branding and social media strategy.
It’s a good thing she prefers Smith to her maiden name.
“As I’ve now experienced first-hand,” the recently divorced Smith says, “even when we’re in the most seemingly robust marriage, circumstances and all manner of other factors can change over time.”
One thing that has changed over time: reclaiming your name is no longer a simple legal matter. Now it requires Tech Support. All the lawyers in the world can’t undo the links that bind you in cyberspace and grant you a digital divorce.
As women increasingly make their presence felt on the web (and even dominate some areas, like social networking sites and the blogosphere), Smith contends “it’s all the more important for (them) to think seriously about their digital profiles.”
It doesn’t matter that you’re not a gadget-head or a member of the Twitterati. If you’ve ever typed in your name and hit “enter” on the Internet, you’re out there.
For starters, your home computer holds, in its omnipotent memory, hardware and software registrations. There is only one way to change these: a visit to Best Buy.
Nearly every one of your paper-and-ink accounts can have a digital clone – hydro, cable, credit cards, telephone, wireless carrier, even your Internet service provider – and bricks-and-mortar billing departments don’t have access to these. Let’s not forget all those direct payment/deposit arrangements. And here you thought online banking was going to be sooo convenient.
At work, there are your HR and payroll records plus those of any third-party providers of insurance or other benefits. IT will have to change all your computer IDs and log-ons and your caller ID name.
And there’s more. Long after the footprints have washed away from the beach where you spent your honeymoon, your electronic footprint remains virtually everywhere.
There are the Internet-only accounts: business and personal websites, blogs, instant messaging, online booksellers, eBay, Ticketmaster, Expedia – any e-tailer where you’ve ever placed an order. There are your social media networks: Twitter, LinkedIn, MySpace, Facebook (this last is will even send out a handy “news” story announcing your new relationship status).
If you want to alter those happy-couple digital photos in your Flickr albums, scissors won’t cut it.
Smith has so far left hers intact. But, she says, “I can appreciate that for some women it may be very challenging to relate to their past and have visible, public reminders.”
However, she is “not a fan at all” of shared e-mail accounts. Even worse is one that combines your two names – one of you will be stuck with JohnLovesJane@gmail.com, and the other one will have to update your 800 “friends,” 600 “followers” and 200 real-life contacts. Don’t forget all the passwords you’ll have to change.
Just as you’re craigslisting all those matrimonial mementoes from around the house, Smith suggests this may be a good time to clear out your cyber-clutter, as well. Maybe you don’t need to keep receiving all those e-newsletters you subscribed to. You can unregister from that illegal music-downloading site. You might want to take your wedding video off YouTube.
Marriage isn’t always forever. The Internet is.
Then:
Government-issued identification
Household bills
Legal documents
Now:
Household bills: hydro, phone, cable, wireless, ISP
Computer and peripheral registrations (software, operating system, router)
E-mail address(es)
Instant messaging account(s)
Online bank account(s) and electronic fund transfers
Online employment records and benefits providers
Office e-mail and Internet accounts and associated log-ons; caller ID
Social media pages (Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Friendfeed, etc.)
E-tailers of all kinds
Your own blogs and websites, personal and professional
E-newsletter subscriptions
Online digital photo albums
A gazillion passwords
The list goes on…
Removing info from Google
A Google search of my own married name yields results nine pages deep, and
there¹s no "delete" button on Google or is there?
Tamara Micner of Google
Canada explains that there is "a simple way to request the removal of any
web page or image that you consider sensitive, inappropriate or outdated."
Go to google.com/webmasters/tools/removals and follow the steps. You'll need
a Google account (free) and the URL(s) of the page(s) you wish to remove.
